24 March 2010

second thoughts

As per usual...things are slow. I never know what to say to people when they ask how the adoption process is going. Really, it's going a lot slower than I'd like. Actually, we are still waiting for paperwork (hmm, somewhat never-ending!) On the whole, it truly is going at a snail's pace. I really am trying to remind myself that there is a reason for this and that the timing for us will be perfect, when it comes.

I have been asked a few times now if we have any second thoughts by several different people. Occasionally this has been asked with an incredulous tone (as in 'are you guys completely nuts?') and other times simply out of curiosity. I can think of one person in particular who has asked me this question at least 4 or 5 times over the course of the last 1.5 years.

No, I(we) have no second thoughts about 'doing' our adoption. The desire has never left us, though some doubts crept in when our agency went bankrupt and we thought it was over. We do feel led to this - and that alone has kept away our second thoughts.

But I have had some other second thoughts:
- should we switch to another country?
- should we try another agency?
- should we consider going on the domestic list?

The first two I considered out of impatience. Perhaps if we switch, things will move faster. Somehow though, these doors have remained shut for us, obviously answering the questions.
Domestic adoption was discouraged too by our agency - we already have 3 children, the likelihood we'd be chosen by a birth mother would be extremely low.
These are good things - really, since considering them gave me angst...
but I feel at peace where I'm at.

And I have no second thoughts.


Dana said...

I don't mind doing a shoot for you guys as a gift. We're here until Sunday afternoon and are free anytime except tomorrow (Thursday) evening after 7.

Mezamashii said...

I love the last line of your blog "I have no second thoughts." Follow your heart.

Gwen said...

You've described my feelings to a "T"! Lots of questions, lots of wondering if we should change directions, but no second thoughts about adopting. We've got our hands to this plough and we're not looking back! :)

Hang in there... we'll see more referrals soon!