acceptance & hope

I realize my lack of posts may leave some wondering. I guess I am in the same place too. I hesitate to write when there is nothing 'positive' to write about. I don't want our journey to be a negative one - or to be remembered that way. So I avoid altogether. (sometimes is a pattern in my life - avoidance).

Truthfully though, we are in a somewhat contented, but more so, accepted, place of waiting. We know that we are still a ways off before hearing any possible referral news for us. For this reason, we've also been avoiding updating documents - even though our agency would like us to - I'm trying to be sensible & realistic about it.

My heart is filled with joy when I hear of others' referrals and court passing and coming home. Though it leaves me with longing, I'm thankful that those children will be loved in their forever home, and it gives me hope. God can still move mountains and make this happen for us. Even if we have to wait.

bit o good news

not quite for our adoption...but a few people have asked me recently about the couple who changed the course of our adoption and that of many others'.
I'm thankful that the Waterloo police dedicated time and effort into this and were able to sort through the fraud paperwork nightmare. I can't imagine what a big job that would have been. Check it out at the link below:
Charges Laid
and I found another one:
Fraud Charges

update again...

Met with our social worker today. In disbelief she commented that some families just have the worst luck with their adoption and seem to hit every roadblock. (if you need clarity, she meant us) I told her not to worry, we don't buy lottery tickets. :)

I've come to a place emotionally, where my heart-rate doesn't jump or even skip a beat. (I'm thinking that'll change when we get a referral). It seems to be a safer place at this time during our eternal wait. The head of the agency popped in and casually suggested that we could switch over to the US...sure, I'd love to go on another list. (At this time I was informed that it'd be between $30-40000 for the US). Ha. Not likely to happen. Well, we're hanging on, slowly collecting our updated paperwork. And hoping that the changes in store - both locally and abroad - will keep us afloat for a while.

cut-backs

Here's more on the possible adoption cut-backs, again, not the most exciting news, but hey, this is what's going on...

Pending Reductions in Adoptions from Ethiopia.

update

This blog hasn't been the easiest for me to keep up. For the most part, there hasn't been anything overly exciting to share; and that is still the case as we plow through collecting more paperwork, getting medicals, tests, etc.

I sometimes still think about abandoning this whole blog altogether. This journey has been truly an emotional rollarcoaster, and though I'd love to take any readers along for the ride 'up', most of the time (to me anyways) it has been a downward ride.
For the most part I am a positive person, and I do believe that our adoption process is out of our hands - in the control of a higher power. It's the down times that I don't always care to share, maybe as a self-protection mechanism like if I don't think about it, blog about it, it may not be true...or just simply the fact that I don't want to think about the negatives...
or is it reality I have trouble facing?

If you are not in the adoption world and have somehow landed here and are reading, these 'negatives' really vary and come up rather unexpectedly at times.

changes by Ethio government that are put into effect immediately, requiring changes to paperwork, different regulations, etc
medical limitations to adoptive parents
reduction of adoptions allowed
etc

As my brain sifts such information I weave threads of reminders through them;
the only way I can keep positive.

He is in control
He is sovereign
His heart is for the orphan

And I try to grasp a bit of reality - that this adoption may not happen - and believe it.

For the time being I'll hang on to this blog

and to our dream.

Thanks for hanging on with me.
and please pray with me.

colours of cheer

so I've been feeling a bit blue lately...getting a bit tired of walking around with a permanent question mark on my head. Really, it's not just adoption related, but this is a major factor.

i know - the weather & eternal paperwork don't help at all


though, for some reason today i broke out of my self-pity and frustration...felt the presence of joy, a reassurance that just maybe everything was going to be alright

and that called for a bloggy background change, a pick-me-up.
how's that for cheerful colours?

would you

this put a smile on my face today...

http://aplacecalledsimplicity.blogspot.com/2011/02/if-god-told-me-to-i-would.html